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rix_scaeduThis piece runs to 3,364 words, and I hope that you enjoy it.
Brogaiday, 15 Deichen, 1893 C.E.
Rebi, 5 Kaalen, 2157 T.M.L.
13 Ueuekayomatilistli, 20 Coatl, 6.11.2.1.8.4.1
Dear Journal,
I could hear the waves on the seawall when I woke this morning, and there was a strong wind from the sea. When I looked out the window, I could see seagulls perched on ledges and roof slopes out of the wind. At home I would make sure I tied my bonnet ribbons tightly if I went out in this weather, but I will have to find out for myself if I have sufficient means to keep my new hats on my head if I go out in this.
I was in time to exchange greetings with Mitzli when I reached the foyer before he left the house for his morning training session. I mentioned that I had missed our little interaction yesterday morning, and he said that they had needed to leave early yesterday to get things done. The he pointed out briefly that we had three more mornings before I leave, and when I do, I won't be bereft - I will be with Axolin and Lord Elnaith who are good men who will take excellent care of me, and Lord Elnaith is preparing to take his vows to me.
I think he missed (or perhaps was avoiding) the point that I value him for himself and as my dear cousin, and I will miss him when I go home. Sad to say, I feel closer to him than I have felt to my brother for years.
The usual assembly of male cousins were present in the breakfast room when I entered. Chiccitlalti and Cipac Chen bade me sit between them and opposite Cousin Mizti, and somehow the conversation turned to the subject of sorcerers and what they do/can do. It seems that the crux of it is that they achieve their results by means that have no physical explanation, and that means without utilising any of the unseen physical forces that we know about such as magnetism. (I suspect that Sura would find this even more fascinating than I did as she knows much more than I do about such forces.) I already knew that sorcerers can provide substantial help with inflicted mental harm but I am not sure how their methods work on things that don't have minds.
After breakfast I went up to my room to tidy myself, and while I was there Nais and I began to organise my belongings into my two pieces of luggage. While doing that we discovered that the shop assistant had failed to mention the secret internal compartments in my new purchase. We are not certain we have found everything.
After we had finished that task, I went to see Cousin Poktlilui in her room to see if there were any tasks or errands she wanted me to undertake, or which would make matters easier if I undertook them. After some consideration, she said that Umeatl, Cousin Ghraimh's youngest daughter, had some errands she wished to run, but her mother and sisters all had other matters to attend to so if I could go with her then she could attend to those this morning and not have to wait. Umeatl is younger than I am by several years and I have noticed that patience is not one of her strong suits. She is also of an age where she may not want to her older female relatives to know everything she does. Speaking (should that be writing?) as someone recently chaffing under the restrictions imposed by my mother, I am sympathetic but I did hope that I wasn't going to be expected to support an assignation of some type with a (possibly) unsuitable man.
Cousin Poktlilui sent me off to arrange matters with Umeatl, who happily accepted my company but was a little more hesitant about taking our maids with us. When I pointed out that Nais knows Tlemutsiko better than I do and that her maid (who is about ten years older than myself) has more experience than either of us in recognising situations we would be wise to avoid, she agreed, with some reluctance, but insisted that we walk to the nearest busy intersection and hire the local equivalent of a taxi. I had no objection to this but did wonder why she didn't want to even try borrowing one of the household's carriages.
As it turned out, Umeatl had probably made earlier enquiries because Matlal mentioned that the carriages were all already in use or promised to others in the household - and then insisted on sending out a footman to fetch a taxi for us. When the taxi arrived, it proved to be very similar to the ones at home - an enclosed space with seating for four on two facing benches and an uncovered seat at the front of the vehicle from which he [the driver] drove two physically but not colour matched llamadas. (That is the singular word but I am not certain whether in Imperial it should be llamadases, llamadasi, llamadasen, something with an irregular internal vowel change, or even if it should be treated like cattle and be two head of llamadas. I am not a grammarian or a linguist, so I have no idea of the right answer or if one has been decided.) Our first stop, where Umeatl paid off the driver, was a relatively obscure temple dedicated to Timaxtma who is primarily known here as the spouse of one of the darker gods and whom Umeatl has chosen as her person deitical patron. While Umeatl conducted her business with the priestess, who ignored me despite my bow and to whom I was not introduced, I stayed where I was left in the outer portion of the temple and read what I could of the friezes and reliefs within sight. From that I learned that one of Timaxtma's epithets is the "The Loyal and Faithful" which she earned by holding to her marriage and husband, despite his transgressions against the other gods, his alleged death, and the courtship of several (living and 'vigorous') deities. I think I can see the appeal as in what I saw his offences were not against her.
When she was done there, we walked to a bookshop. It was not the sort of bookshop that sold children's books or books in Imperial. Umeatl knew exactly what she wanted, and I did not question her choices. I did wonder whether I should purchase something informative from what appeared to be a section of books providing practical carnal advice, but I decided against it because none of them seemed to be written in simple enough Coac-htl that I could comprehend the detail they provided.
We then walked to the nearest intersection, hired another taxi to take us home, and were home in plenty of time for lunch.
I took my meal between Cousin Mizti and Mr Dhairaign. Our conversation was...a very polite interrogation. Not about anything more particular than the Empire, but it was as if they were trying to find out everything I know, think, and feel about some innocuous (to me) and everyday subjects such as food prices, the weather, the current tribulations of the dh'Lhong family (about which they could tell me more than I know, but the Empress Mhaihild incident has had ramifications), and the long mooted currency changes. I was just explaining that because of how long the discussion has been going on, I am not expecting any final decision on the matter any time soon (frankly, if they do make the changes, I expect the discussion to begin again almost immediately) when Nantli Yahari interrupted from the opposite side of the table to point out that they had been making it hard for me to enjoy my meal, to the point that she was surprised that I had time to eat. They didn't seem to know how to reply to that (this is a skill I may hope to develop as I get older) but I said that these subjects are ones I enjoy discussing and that my mother's questions at the meal table are often more difficult to contend with. I added that, if anything, they now owed me their view on these subjects within the Confederation.
I was considering whether to spend my afternoon with the next Aunty Ssang novel or with my embroidery when Lord Elnaith called and asked me if I would care to go for a drive with him in a carriage borrowed from the consul. He stated that it was his intention to take us a little way north up the coast, have tea at a small inn there, then return. He made it clear that he expected Nais to accompany us, and that the excursion would take all afternoon.
Great-aunt and my lady Cousins agreed that this was an acceptable plan, so Nais was summoned with my hat and an over garment, and we set off in a barouche. (While I was waiting for Nais I overheard Umeatl's question about why this was allowed while she was - something. The undertone explanation included "betrothed", "open carriage", and "maid.") I must say that the seats in the consul's barouche are very comfortable. It helped, of course, that the weather was almost perfect for such an excursion. Lord Elnaith was kind enough to be complimentary about my hat and added that he saw no reason for me to return to bonnets when we went home to the Empire, unless I wished to. He also apologised for neglecting me, to which I queried whether he had, because I knew that he was working, and because I haven't been betrothed before, so I have no basis of comparison for how much attention he should be giving me. Yes, I was living in the same house as Anna when she was betrothed, but Caster's situation then is quite different to Lord Elnaith's situation now. Additionally, the circumstances of our engagements are quite different, not that I said any of that to Lord Elnaith.
When we left the city, we were more exposed to the wind, and I was very glad of my outer garment. Much of our conversation was spent debating whether it would be appropriate for me to attend a musical evening at the consulate, given that none of my senior female relatives in Tlemutsiko could reasonably be asked to enter the Imperial consulate for political reasons - and the possibility of Imperial criminal charges. Axolin and/or Miztli could certainly accompany me but Lord Elnaith said that much as he enjoyed a bracing conversation with my Cousin Mizti, it would be best for everyone if Cousin Mizti didn't cross paths with some of the consulate staff. Then the conversation moved onto our musical tastes. Lord Elnaith had been used to attending both the Grand Imperial Opera and the Spielzung Ordnung (he even attended the last time Lhairgn sang Fheldhmus in "Three Brothers") but what caused me to express my envy was the news that one of his personal luxuries is season tickets to Perrimhain's Theatre - he has seen the first season of every new play they have put on for the last five years plus numerous performances by Jherzhi and Bhoynh. My experiences of attending performances in Umbrial when Mother chose to include me seem rather sparse and mean by comparison. To be fair to Mother, she generally attends the theatre when she can get a seat, or seats, in a friend's box.
The inn proved to be a small one situated not so far from the city that we would need to change animals before we returned home. We were also expected, because Lord Elnaith had made arrangements for our visit. These arrangements included a gratefully received private retiring room for Nais and myself. [I understand that most of the world operates successfully with arrangements that are more or less a hole in the ground, but I am very happy to be privileged enough that I do not have to.] Tea involved two outdoor tables, both with a brazier positioned just to one side in case the shadowed afternoon became too cool for comfort. Nais and Lord Elnaith's manservant occupied the one closest to the inn while we sat far enough beyond them that our conversation was private.
I believe that privacy was the point of our trip. Lord Elnaith had a number of things to say, which he did clearly, briefly but not too briefly, and without euphemism or sugar coating. It was not a conversation we could have had in my cousins' house, the consulate or, indeed, anywhere in Tlemutsiko. If this is an example of how he intends to communicate during our marriage, I believe I will be happy. I do not know whether his method of handling these issues comes from his military or his legal training but I do find it felicitous. He also said that taking everything into account, if for some reason or confluence of circumstances, returning me to the Empire came to mean placing me back under my mother's roof then he would leave me in the care of my cousins until a wedding could be arranged under either Confederation or Imperial law in Tlemutsiko.
He finished by saying that trust and morals (or ethics) do not necessarily have anything to do with political allegiance.
I had less to say on the way home than I had on the way out because Lord Elnaith had given me much to think on. What conversation we had was about the scenery and the passing traffic. We also held hands most of the way back, which may have contributed to my lack of conversation.
Lord Elnaith escorted me inside on our return to my cousins' house but did not stay, and departed after giving me a kiss on the cheek after I took off my hat.
[I do like the way he smells up close.]
[I will not be handing this journal over to Mother when I return home. If she wants to publish a lady's travel journal for profit and admiration, then she can go on her own journey and write her own experiences and observations.]
When I joined the family in the parlor before dinner, Great-aunt and Cousin Poktlilui made sure to ask me about my afternoon. In detail. This was not unexpected because it was a whole afternoon's expedition with a gentleman and "only" our servants for chaperonage and my relations are responsible for me. Also, Nais told me when she helped me change that the housekeeper had been asking her about the afternoon, with particular interest in whether she had let me out of her sight and whether we might have gotten - I don't think I will finish that sentence, but apparently the housekeeper insinuated that Nais may have been distracted from her chaperonage duties by the manly pulchritude (my phrase) of Lord Elnaith's manservant. I must admit that I haven't paid the man any more attention than to be able to recognise him, but when I think on it, I would consider hiring him as a footman so that means he is tall and good looking. Of course, if he ceased being Lord Elnaith's personal manservant but stayed in our household, I can't imagine he would be anything less than the underbutler.
I was able to assure my relatives that everything was completely proper between Lord Elnaith and I, and that meant not mentioning the hand holding on the way home, and I was able to gloss over the important part of the afternoon as "private conversation." Heaven knows what they think that means - it might be better if I don't.
At dinner I was between Chicyouali and Yeixi. With both of them I managed to steer the conversation to their interests, because I did not wish to touch on the subjects Lord Elnaith had touched on, or my afternoon with Lord Elnaith. Yeixi's current primary interest is the situation concerning the althepetls on the other side of the mountains that I have heard discussed by Cousin Ghrus. Chicyouali, on the other hand, has some concerns closer to his home. When he told me what they were, in broader terms than he understood the issue, I commented that what he described resembled the first I read in the newspapers at home about the precious metals problem in our eastern provinces. He then asked me, in detail, about the early stages of that matter, and I was happy to indulge him because I saw no harm in it, and it helped avoid subjects I wanted to avoid.
My lady cousins all had more questions about my afternoon over our kasoolht. Umeatl wasn't happy with "a private conversation" as an explanation of our major activity this afternoon, and I thought I might have been unnecessarily (and unexpectedly) frosty to her when I replied that it was a private conversation. However, my older cousins and Great-aunt were approving, with Cousin Poktlilui observing that as the wife of an Imperial kinsman who is also a Gentleman of the Bedchamber I was likely to find myself thrust into the role of a great lady on many occasions, and it was good that I can draw the line over which others cannot step.
After the gentlemen joined us, Chicyouali had me repeat what I'd said about the beginning of the precious metals issue at home. Not all the gentlemen were interested in what I had to say but all of the men of Cousin Ghraimh's family, Cousin Ghrus, and Axolin were in addition to Xiloxoch and Tehaneume. When I finished speaking, a vigorous but not acrimonious discussion in Coac-htl started up among my listeners. The speed of the discussion and the vocabulary defeated my efforts to follow it, although I did catch some althepetl and family (I think) names.
Miztli and Cousin Mizti quietly drew me off to the other side of the room, while the discussion was distracting our relatives, to a table where we spent the rest of the evening playing a three handed game of maistoto. I asked my two cousins if they wouldn't rather be involved in the ongoing discussion, which grew at one point to include all the other adults in the room. Cousin Mizti replied that this type of analysis is not his strength, and that as one of my senior male relatives it is his responsibility to make sure that I am not unreasonably exploited by the rest of the family. Miztli added that as my fond cousin and Elnaith's friend it is a duty of his to see me protected and comfortable, as opposed to being relentlessly plumbed for information. Writing this now, I wonder at the phrase "fond cousin" but in the moment what got my attention was his lack of honorific in speaking about Lord Elnaith. When I queried that, he observed that in the circles he moved in, their relationship had moved to a level of familiarity where honorifics between peers were not expected, and they had agreed that they were peers. Of course I had nothing to say to that, and so we got on with our game.
We didn't put the cards down until almost everyone else had gone up to their rooms. Miztli declared himself very happy with his evening and remarked that it was a pity that he couldn't invite me into the Jaguar Knights' common room because some of his brother Knights enjoyed a good game of cards too. Cousin Mizti thanked us both for an enjoyable evening, and after we had put the cards away and the card table to rights, we all went upstairs together. As both my cousins have rooms on the floor below mine, they left me at the landing and I came up to my room on my own.
Three full days and then we embark on the ship for home. Tomorrow is by necessity a day of quiet and rest, but I expect that the two days after that will be full and busy if my departure from home is any guide.
Anadrasata Nearabhigan